'Oprah Effect' Helps Obama, Ghetto Poets
Posted by wombat
CHICAGO -- "It's important that the American people recognize and embrace not only the historic move forward that is embodied by Barack Obama, both socially and politically, but also the book 'Smoking Hash: Mama, Am I Ghetto Trash?' by poet Tutu Shablik Jackson," said Oprah.
Polls taken at the close of Oprah's June 5th show which showcased both the Senator and poet showed a surge in Obama support amongst dumb white women and a rise in sales of poetry books written by disenfranchised blacks.
However, some polled claimed to be impervious to Oprah's influence. "I watch the show, yeah, but I don't base my opinions and lifestyle on the things Oprah says," said Deborah LaLange, a dumb white woman, as she adjusted her bright orange blouse and tribal-patterned skirt. "I'm not a zombie," she added.
Breaking back from the first commercial showed an audience of dumb white women in thunderous applause as Senator Obama finished reading aloud an exerpt from Jackson's book.
"I think he's just fabulous," said one dumb white woman of the poet. "I totally understand black people." When asked if she would recommend Jackson's book to friends she came back with an unwavering, "Yes. Oh, yes. They both get my vote."
Both the Senator and poet were unavailable for comment.
- A.P.
CLINTON CAVALIER ABOUT MURDER, MAKING OUT
Posted by wombat
SIOUX FALLS, South Dakota -- Today, to prove a point regarding the history of how long it often takes the Democratic party to settle on a Presidential candidate, Hillary Clinton reminded the nation that it was well into June of 1968 when Robert Kennedy was killed. "And he was doing worse then I am," she added.
She then took a moment to regale reporters with a non sequitur: "I remember the day we were learning about Abraham Lincoln and John Wilkes Boothe in grade school. It was the day I got my first period, so I didn't get the whole lesson. But, I'm pretty sure it was funny."
Shocked reporters simply waited until she continued. "And I remember being at make-out ridge with Bill the day I heard John Kennedy was shot. It was on the radio and Bill gave me a huge hickey. I had to wear a turtleneck for a week!"
Bill Burton, campaign spokesman for the Obama camp, could at first only close his eyes and shake his head when asked to comment, eventually saying, "I dunno. What can you say about that? Bitch is crazy."
- A.P.
NEW COMIC!
Posted by wombat
I've been working on a new comic at stripgenerator.com. As of now I have a lot already posted. The embedded image, however, doesn't look right. So you'll have to follow a link:
New Comic!
Any comments left here or on my stripgenerator blog would be greatly appreciated. :)
a brand new racist cartoon!
Posted by dirt
meet "NIGGY"
Continue reading "a brand new racist cartoon!"