Namflow

A True to Life Haiku

I shaved my nuts for
yesterday's date you cancelled
cold, lonely they are

The JustFriendsittyVille Horror

So during Golden Week I had a date with a girl who I had seen a handful of times before. The plan consisted of bar hopping in Takefu looking for young people, cool places, adventure, and ideally some loving! Until our wonderful night took a premature detour into JustFriendsVille.

Women and the men who beat them

So I was out getting a drink with one of my ex-coworkers a few Fridays ago. She's currently seeing some dude who I thought was pretty damned cool for a Japanese guy. She showed me some pics from when they went on vacation with a few friends. They really looked like a great couple. After picture time she started talking in feverish Japanese to the bartenders so I wouldn't understand. I got the jist of the convo, which was there was big trouble brewing in little japan. She told me that this conversation wasn't to leave this room as she lifted up her pant leg to reveal two decently sized, fresh cuts. I asked her, "How did you get those cuts?" She said it was her boyfriends shoe. That didn't make much sense, so I asked again "Where did you get those cuts?" She replied the same way, "It was my boyfriend's shoe." I replied, "So he kicked you?" She nodded.

Post Office Incompetence

The single biggest pain in the ass thing to do here in Japan is send money orders from the post office. I can order food, I can get my car fixed when it's broken, I can pay my bills, I can do everything imaginable - except send a freaking money order from the post office.

500 Digits of Pi

Just in time for Pi Day, I entered a talent show where I recited 500 digits of pi from memory. Now, thanks to the miracle of modern technology, you can see the awesomeness for yourself!

500 Digits of Pi

The Tequila Story

The last thing I clearly remember from that night was standing up, going to the bar, and asking for a glass of water to try and prevent tomorrow's inevitable hangover. A hot chick heard me and said, "You're a man! You don't need water, you need more tequila!" She was hot so I listened to her and had my umpteenth shot of tequila. The next thing I knew I awoke in my apartment at oh god in the morning with quite the hangover. My house phone was ringing. "Shut up parents" I thought to myself as I unplugged the phone and went back to sleep. About an hour of drunken hungover sleep later I started to regain consciousness. I was in my bed, in my apartment, with no recollection of　leaving the bar, going home, or falling asleep. Ben, who went with me to the all you can drink party, was nowhere to be seen even though he was supposed to crash at my house. I had no idea where he was or what had happened. The only thing I knew was that my head was pounding and I had a sneaking suspicion something was wrong.