-=(Sagien)=-

An Experiment with Words

As you may or may not be able to tell from the title, this is yet another picture-less post.

I honestly don't know why some of you will think I lack material to write about if I have no pictures.

Oh well, onward.

I fuckin hate dentists.

I was late for my dental appointment today. My tardiness was the direct result of me spending several more minutes than necessary in the bathroom swishing Listerine through my teeth. Even though I love this mouthwash, foul taste and all, I usually do not let it sit in my mouth for five minutes at a time. I was doing this because I cringe at the thought of the dentist looking in my mouth and spotting fragments of food or experience the halitosis escaping from my maw.

I went to the dentist because the frequency of the toothaches has increased. That and I can feel it start to chip away at my pain treshhold. I've often caught myself talking to some nonexistent being telling it that 'I get the point, theres something wrong, we'll go to the dentist if you promise to stop hurting.'

Obviously this approach doesn't work. It kept hurting anyway, so I went anyway.

Considering that I probably had an excess of 2000mg of Tylenol floating in my bloodstream, I was feeling pretty good. The tooth wasn't being painful, yet I can feel with my tongue how it could be. The dentist took the X-ray and came up with two options.

a) we could pull the tooth.

or

b) we can save the tooth.

Option A was appealing to me because I do not have dental insurance yet. Pulling the tooth would be cheaper. Option B required an expensive root canal.

So I asked him to convince me why I should try to save it.

"Well, if you pull the tooth, that means you will lose one molar. The tooth next to it is the wisdom tooth. It will eventually have to be removed as well. That's two molars gone from your bottom jaw. Without anything to rest on, the corresponding teeth on the top will eventually fall off, making it a grand total of four molars lost," was the sales pitch.

Not wanting to further advertise that I came from the third world, I went with option B.

That pretty much brings you up to speed as I bring you to today's story.

Your way, right away

Sagien just got out of his dental appointment. The whole right side of his face is numb, and he's feeling rather upset about the large chunk of money he had to spend.

He can also sense the impending hunger coming up.

"Something quick, " he thought.

He drives into a Burger King drive-thru.

"It's greasy, disgusting, oily, and delicious," he justifies his selection of food. He goes through the ordering squaking box, places his order and proceeds to the first window. Seeing that there are a few cars in front of him, he decided to pass the time by calling someone. He gets on the horn with Ltle.

A few minutes of idle conversation go by and he drives up to the take out window. He has his Visa card at the ready. The attendant stares at him blankly.

"Did you tell me it was credit back there?" he asks.

"No, you didn't ask," replied Sagien, taking a half-second pause from the phone conversation.

"Yes, I did."

"No, you didn't." The cashier sighs a long sigh and starts abruptly punching buttons on the register. Apparently, he had to re-enter the order into the machine. Sagien returns to his phone conversation after the cashier took his card.

"Here you go," said the gentleman behind the window, "Next time you have to tell me its credit when I ask."

"You didn't ask." Sagien takes the drink and puts it in the holder.

"Yeah, I did. The system wouldn't let me go through if I don't ask," he argued, handing Sagien his bag of food.

"Wait a sec," Sagien says into the phone and puts it down before grabbing the bag. He looks up to the fast food host and says, "You didn't ask me, it doesn't matter if you did, shut the hell up, you're a goddamn retard, see you later."

Acknowledgements

This post has been brought to you by Listering, Tylenol, Burger King and Visa. Unfortunately, they didn't have to pay a dime for this kind of exposure.

Posted by sagien at January 21, 2005 06:11 PM