March 10, 2006

The 'Mike is Great' Lighter

[picture unavailable]

Where the fuck is it?

The 'Mike is Great' lighter originated in a spark of originality one day in the Hamilton Mall.

Here's how it happened.

Sagien: I'd like to have this Zippo engraved. ::places a Zippo lighter on the counter of Things Remembered::

clerk: Okay.. what's your name?

Sagien: Mike.

clerk: What font would you like?

Sagien: Olde English.

clerk: And what would you like it to say?

Sagien: Mike Is Great.

I was very proud of that lighter and my juvenile cleverness. However, over the years it developed a mind of it's own.

Whenever I had it in my possession it produced nothing but bad luck, and when it was gone, life was great. Girlfriends broke up with me when I had it in my possession, I've lost jobs, roommates, places to live, cars, etc..

One day, I've had enough of it and I let Joe Camel know of it's evil ways. He claims to not know of the whereabouts but I call bullshit.

Tonight, I sit here full of alcohol and I've decided that I miss it and that it wishes me no harm.

So.. where the fuck is it, Camel?

I'd like to take a picture of it.

Posted by sagien at March 10, 2006 03:38 AM
Comments

Technically, I cannot tell you the physical location of the lighter, because it no longer exists as a lighter. In an effort to forever break the Curse, I disassembled it, then consumed a large quantity of Drink. I waited until the Drink had made me forgetful, then I scattered the components throughout the land. I did, however, write myself a cryptic set of clues as to the location of the components…

Posted by: Joe Camel at March 13, 2006 07:20 PM

....

That's amazing. It kind of breaks my heart to think that it might be gone forever.

Posted by: sagien at March 13, 2006 09:55 PM
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